June 30, 2010

the boundries of cheating

In the movie Chloe, directed by Atom Egoyan, this is what Liam Neeson's character says to his wife, played by Julianne Moore, in a scene to the end of the movie:

-I didn't screw her. I flirted with her.

And I'm like "Yeah, right." even though it is not as catchy as "Release the Kraken," i believe this phrase should be in every husband's repertory, because when you put it this way, it suddenly becomes ok if you flirt with another woman.

to be fair to the movie, i really think it is a great story about relationships, marriage, and love, and it is one of the very rare movies with a pretty calm pace but yet keeps you watching. and yes, it is about cheating spouses. 

in the movie Knocked Up, there is this guy who has the habbit of dissappearing at odd hours and his wife rightfuly suspects that he is cheating on her. but, it turns out that the guy meets with his friends to play some kind of a nerd game. when the wife, however, finds out what is really going on, she feels dissappointed as much as she would be if she had caught the guy with another woman, claiming that what the guy has done is not any different than actually cheating.

of course both of the movies are just some portraits of real life situtations and maybe it would be misleading to consider them, especially the latter, as absolute references to the real life itself. yet, it makes me wonder what is the boundry of cheating. or, are there really any boundaries? i mean, is it ok if you flirt with a girl to some extent, but then stop at a point saying "that's it. this is where i draw the line," or maybe worse "my wife will feel im cheating on her if i go any further"?

obviously enough, i don't have the answer, and i don't believe that there is an absolute answer. it is more convenient to think that every relation has a different perception of boundaries, and what might seem totally normal to a couple might be considered as a sin for another couple.

on the other hand, it will be wise to memorize that phrase i mentioned above, just in case.


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